John Nelson keeps an eye on Alcudia!

• On The Buses
  Work will start again in earnest on October 8th to complete Stage 2 of Alcúdia’s bus station, as that’s the day the local ban on construction during summer months is lifted. Apart from the bus station itself, the new building will contain a café and a tourist information office. The architect’s aim is to combine modernity with respect for the nearby medieval and renaissance fortifications. However, as with any such project, I’m sure the finished result will delight and appal residents in equal measure when it is finally unveiled. Let’s hope nobody likens it to a "monstrous carbuncle on the face of a much-loved and elegant friend".
  
  During the first stage last winter the remains of a small building from the 17thC were discovered and it is now possible to view the foundations through a glass built into the pavement. Although there is always the chance the work could be held up if anything of archaeological interest is encountered, the Ayuntamiento estimates the work will be completed within six months, in time for next summer. Fingers crossed.
• Are You Being Served?
  As a department store, El Corte Inglés is certainly a cut above Grace Brothers. For one thing even Mrs. Slocombe would be hard pushed to compete with some of the airs and graces of the staff in Palma. What would they make of her pussy?
  
  Have you ever wondered why it is called El Corte Inglés? For years I thought it meant “The English Court” but I’ve recently discovered that that would be La Corte Inglesa. In actual fact the shop name translates as “The English Cut”. At the turn of the last century some Savile Row tailors opened a shop in Madrid. As their tailoring was considered to be of such high standard, the locals referred to their work and the shop as El Corte Inglés. In time, this became a general phrase to indicate superior quality. Years later the shop was the first premises of the man who created the department store chain. His full name was Don Ramón Areces Rodríguez. He wasn’t English.
• As Time Goes By
  A couple returning to the UK after 30 years abroad asked friends to give them some idea of how life had changed while they’ve been away. Some of the replies were spot on.
  - Coffee is now served by the pint, and it will cost more than a pint of beer
  - When children carried guns before, they squirted water
  - Once you received your gas from British Gas, your electricity from the electricity board and your phone service from BT. Now, you get your gas from Barclays, your electricity from British Gas, and your phone service from Tesco.
  - However, my personal favourite was the advice to get their skates on and hurry back to England because the DFS Carpet Sale, which started just before they left, will be ending very soon.
• The Good Life
  On Sunday morning I sat on the balcony and read the newspapers while devouring crumpets smothered in Marmite. At a café in Alcanada I enjoyed the stunning views across the Bay of Alcúdia and a refreshing caña. Mid afternoon was time to cool off with a swim in the sea at Alcúdia Pins. Back home to get the coals burning for the evening BBQ with friends. Sat on the patio till after midnight and finished both a nice bottle of Rioja and the Sunday Times Crossword (first time in years). Not such a bad life.
• In Loving Memory
  My aunt reports that her best friend’s husband (who owns a chain of funeral directors in Devon) has, apparently, started signing his letters and greeting cards …. yours eventually.
• And Finally
  “If a dog will not come to you after having looked you in the face, you should go home and examine your conscience.”  Woodrow Wilson

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